Monday, November 19

The washing machine repair


started promisingly, Benny was positive 

It's a broken bog-wangler and the thrush is worn out, I'll order the parts and be back Friday, we'll have it going again in no time...  


Benny disappeared, returned at the end of the week ... with bog-wanglers and thrushes but could not fix the machine ... I tried to put a stop to the mending ... very grateful for efforts but washer has done sterling service etc. .... probably time to get a new one .... Benny refused to be defeated. Rudi was sort-of-here too, trying to hang a door while under the influence. It was like I was trapped in one of my unhappy dreams.


I was also distracted by their physical allure - How could these two men be in the house at the same time, their admirably large bellies and too-small t-shirts, both men showing off ample arse-crackage  - and both men unbelievably smelly.

Benny has  been back twice more, each time a little smellier and each time he unpicks the washer a little more, calls a mate and tells me he'll be right back.

Benny was back for the last time this morning, smellier than a wet dog after rolling in cow pats. I allowed him to try the one more thing he had really really wanted to try and then I said that we should let the machine rest in peace, he was almost in tears and wouldn't accept payment - he had failed. This required soothing noises and reassurance from me while trying to edge him towards the door - sort of humming and at the same time trying to pat him on the shoulder without actually patting him on the shoulder.

I have now successfully ordered a new washer.










8 comments:

  1. I'm seeing Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum from the cartoon Alice in Wonderland in your house! Not helpful, I know, but you have a new washer on the way! xoxo

    p.s. in the 50 years I've been married I've only purchased 2 sets (washer and separate dryer). Right now we have a matching front loading
    red pair!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tweedles Dum and Dee are spot on Sav. I have red machine envy, my new one is plain old white. xxx

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  2. I'm guessing that the new machine has all sorts of fancy new operating modes and eco features that you will enjoy very much.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've taken a very lo-tech version, but it is highly rated for efficiency xxx

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  3. Ha Ha Ha!!! I love that drawing of the crackage!!!
    I hope you're having a spinning time with your new machine!
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I just want it there and to stop having to use the launderette

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  4. "ample arse-crackage" This may come under the heading of TMI.
    I hope your new-fangled wangle-mangler is better than mine, which, apparently, hates me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Many machines hate me, that last one was such a dear - that's why I was reluctant to let it go. xxx

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