An actual god-sized bathtub of water tipped over our house last saturday

 

it came right into the house like the roof didn't even exist 

the stairs became a waterfall

what couldn't wait to come down the stairs squirted itself through the light fittings

I had that look on my face like Carrie after the buckets of blood dropped on her at the prom

 

Apart from that August hasn't been my favourite month this year.

Nearly Emergencies

I returned to Bristol on Sunday.  The Man took the car out then he rang me

Did you notice the hairline crack - the one running halfway along the bottom of the windscreen?

I hadn't.  I arranged for someone to fix it

that evening the Man said

my arms are achey  

on Monday morning the GP listened to his body and said 

you seem fine but we'll just take some blood  to make sure

in the afternoon a text arrived 

GO TO HOSPITAL NOW!!!!  

keyhole surgery - three stents around his heart

on Friday afternoon his son brought him home.  

We  celebrated a week of not having an Emergency with roast chicken and sweet potatoes