Friday, September 26

I answered one of the small ads


not the one that involved a dachshund with a jacuzzi and pool table in Cairo but one that involved a lady with a dog in London

I arrive at the House of Astonishing Things just before Doglady leaves for her holiday - the house is covered with lots of little notes for me but they are difficult to notice because of all the astonishing things that keep filling my eyes.

Her holiday outfit is a pink velour pant suit and she carries a tiny parachute silk holdall - she is holding out a big canvas tent-like thing

she makes a fanfare

TA DAAAHH!

and like the Great Splendido she swirls the heavy tent-thing onto her body and becomes enormous.

She pats the lumps that are all round her back and front and recites:

suncream
maps
shoes
sandals
hairbrush
deodrant
camera
reading glasses
sunglasses
books-my-god-they-shouldn't-complain-about people-who-take-books-on-holiday-do-they-want illiterate-clients?
guidebooks
dictionary

she is triumphant!



7 comments:

  1. Not carry-on — wear-on! Brilliant!

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    Replies
    1. there were certain flaws in the scheme - apparently it is horrible to wear

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  2. I thought that velour had been banned for use on humans. Fire hazard? Perhaps accounting for the burned bed spread in a later post. Are you intending to stay in the home of this person while she is traveling? I might suggest a protective layer.

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    Replies
    1. What humans will wrap themselves in never ceases to amaze Kim - I am just here for a few days, thanks for KB tip xx

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  3. If you're staying, you know there's a stand-by line for KB tickets each night...

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  4. sweet mary sunshine, but i swear, sweet pea, i have been on planes with people like that! *shiver* thankfully, i've never had to sit near one! xoxoxo

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    Replies
    1. At least she can take off that coat (it's actually impossible to sit in it) - I have never seen such a device but she is American so maybe it's more common over there

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