I still keep my eye on the small ads;
LONLEY MEN
I am living in one bedrom flat
in Queensway Bayswater. I am
looking a lady who gone clean my
flat and share my lonely time.
No charge for staying at flat.
No smoker please.
Who could resist?
Polyanskaya’s Film-Infused Water.
-
Late last month I realized that I had never read Irina Polyanskaya’s second
novel, Читающая вода [(The) reading water; Water that reads], and decided
to re...
1 hour ago
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ReplyDeleteIt may be difficult, but resistance will be achieved. Now, if he could just spell, he may be capable of tempting me.
ReplyDeletepoor bugger could really do with a better marketing plan.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if he bought the yellow paper specially. Poor sod.
ReplyDeleteIf that works, I'm getting some yellow paper!
ReplyDeleteBless.
ReplyDeletereally?? bless his heart! xoxoxo
ReplyDeleteSad. :(
ReplyDeleteI'd do it if he'd agree instead to do the cleaning. Did he leave a telephone number?
ReplyDeleteWell?????
ReplyDeleteHe did say those magic words, "no charge".
Ah, but someone would pay, and it what coin?
oh poor lonely man. I hope he finds someone
ReplyDeletePoor man indeed! - his ad should've read
ReplyDeletewanted cleaner/whore to perform for no charge
Sadness can be so...beautiful sometimes!
ReplyDeleteI wonder if anyone would ever answer an ad like that. I suppose if they were desperate enough for a roof over their poor little head.
ReplyDeleteIt is the poetry of sadness isn't it?
ReplyDeleteLulu, I think you see him as asking for a lot whereas some of us see him as asking for not a lot out of life. He's not asking for a young, slim woman, or one with big boobs, or one who keep him in beers, or laugh at all his jokes, who won't threaten his intelligence, or one who will pretend to like his friends, or make him feel like a king. He's not even asking for love or respect, just that someone could take care of the house and share his Zone 1 home (and most likely bed). And trust me, there are plenty of women dossing in London whose options look a lot worse.
ReplyDeleteDon't consider moving in there! Never live with someone who can't spell.
ReplyDelete"No smoker please" - that's just picky.
ReplyDeleteYou'd cheer him up Lulu - and it may solve your flatting situation. No smoker as well!! Poor possum. He is certainly pushed to action though. Sad - but not depressed. Gorgeous I say! Hope he finds someone.
ReplyDeleteCould he be a psychopath in disguise?
ReplyDeletehe just sounds like someone from one of the those reality shows where apparently no one spells, speaks the native tongue or has particularly high standards in relationships or cleanliness.
ReplyDeleteif you apply, maybe you'd get on tv!
Hey. I'm coming to London on Tuesday.
ReplyDeleteThis is the kind of wonderful opportunity I've always wanted.
Sounds like an awesome opportunity, why went grammar and tact and intelligence stand in the way. :-)
ReplyDeleteIt doesn't quite scan pefectly, but it's a fair attempt at dactylic tetrametre!
ReplyDeleteSorry I can't respond individually today.
ReplyDeleteMy own responses to the ad were mixed (and far less charitable than most of yours). I think he should get himself a cat and one of those blow up dolls. I'm also making an assumption that he could use the exercise provided by doing his own housework.
Men plural?
ReplyDeleteDoes he have multiple personalities?
Quite possibly - do you want to join the queue to get his number? I'm thinking of hosting this as a lucky dip.
ReplyDeletefyi;
ReplyDeleteI also work nights so I like to sleep in and keep the shades drawn.
I also like to collect Transylvanian soil and keep it in a large wooden container in centre of the pad, and oh, I am very allergic to garlic.
*God* that takes me back ... it's how I got married.
ReplyDeleteIf someone was offering boxes of chocolates, would that sweeten the deal? Uh, asking for a friend.
ReplyDeleteDonn - wooden container in flat fine as long as I can use it to plant my herbs and garlic in ... oh!
ReplyDeleteRed - xl needs to know if it was the yellow card that got you the girl or did you leave a trail of chocolates leading to the church?
Love it. A real keeper.
ReplyDeletepoignant
ReplyDeleteI wonder if he got any tackers? I mean takers?
ReplyDeleteHave you managed to find yourself a new base yet?
ReplyDeleteI was a tacker - Frenchie, you can expect to be hearing abut my new life in Queensway anyday son
ReplyDeletedid you see this or find it on the net?
ReplyDeleteI'm curious where this was posted. It might be better than craigs list.
welcome to you lisleman, I saw this in the window of a London newsagent
ReplyDeleteI'm so disappointed you removed the telephone number.
ReplyDeleteSandy
Hi WOW - D'you want to join the lucky dip draw?
ReplyDeleteFunny, yet sad.
ReplyDelete