Sunday, December 28

More Banquets

29th December
There was an unnerving incident back in October when we first met the Druids. In true British style we’ve all pretended that Mrs Druid's offer to give The Director some 'special' therapy never happened and we've become friendly in a neighbourish sort of way.

We agreed that the Druids would put their sheep on our land in the spring and Mrs Druid is clearly keen to strengthen our friendship further - suggestions to do social things together have been made. I find that her attitude towards me often has acidic undertones and The Director has said that he finds her greetings are a little more passionate than he would consider normal, but we are neighbours and it’s always nicer to be friends n’est ce pas?

The Director is worried about his weight, and I’d assured him that I wouldn’t accept too many social invitations over Christmas. My exact promise was that I wouldn’t get us involved in social eating events on consecutive days.

Earlier in the month Mrs Druid had invited me to the 'Great British Boxing Day Bash', a huge gathering for all the Brits in the area - I’d turned down this offer saying that I had a prior engagement, she'd pressed for details of my 'engagement' and then suggested other opportunities for us to get together. To her advances I offered a combination of truths, half-truths and outright lies but my general ineptitude at this sort of thing combined with her persistence somehow resulted in my acceptance to go to the Druids for supper on Christmas day, although that was the one day that I really had accepted an invitation elsewhere.

Christmas Day lunch at the Bontettes consisted of a series of super-rich dishes - Mme B very keen to impress us with the superiority of French cuisine had outdone herself. M. Bontette keeps an excellent wine cellar and was extremely generous with it. By the time the last caramel-stuffed date had been eaten, the last drop of Montbazillac consumed and it was a polite time to leave we simply tottered directly from their house to the Druids for more turkey - the evening passed in a drugged, overstuffed haze and I still have no idea how we got home.


  1. Hey Lulu,hope you are enjoying/surviving christmas! That's some adventure ye are having out in La belle France.It's well written and a right rivetting read to boot, I shall stay tuned in.Thanks for droppin' by da blog and sayin' ye loiked da poteegraph, call again whenever ye like ,ya hear?.A bientot, totalfeckineejit.

  2. "can't remember much about that particular evening"

    That's sometimes a great strategy for the holidays.

    Best wishes in '09 to you.

  3. Wow, what a whirlwind. I agree with what xl says, sometimes the holidays need a strategy. I went back to colorado for the holidays and my mom wanted to parade me around to all her society events and I was being very strategical in avoiding them.

  4. I just hope they didn't subject your senseless body to some sort of pagan perversion. Damn those Druids!

  5. Welcome Mr T. And such lovely things you're saying - thank you

    xl - if in doubt pretend it never happened, is a strategy that's always worked for me. Bonne Année

    Hi Dooder, mum's are great paraders aren't they? I get my own back by making them mend stuff when they come and visit.

    Mr Bananas - my senseless body has been subjected to so much that I don't think it'd notice the odd pagan perversion. I did wake up with bite marks in funny places though.

  6. Good strategy! Anything to avoid the Great Big British Boxing Day Bash. And to achieve the duty dinner already comatose and partly anaesthetised was genius.

  7. Glad to hear you survived the holidays.

    I refused to get out of my pajamas, thereby avoiding any duty visits. :-)

  8. "can't remember much about that particular evening"


    You don't remember stripping off your shirt and jumping on the table singing "When I Think About You I Touch Myself" while you did those crazy can can kicks? I'll certainly never forget it. You really livened up the party, my dear.

  9. Brother T - I keep a large cabinet of anaesthetics at hand at all times

    Kelly - the pajama tactic is a good one if there is heating. This house is so cold I have to be permanently clad in mountaineering gear.

    Prunella - Thank God for your clear recall, I was concerned I might have embarrassed myself


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